1. Why is "Scientific Puppy Love" unscientific?
On the ranking of anxious parenting, Beijing Haidian District parents must be on the list.
Their overall quality is high, the chicken baby is the first, we serve this, but recently started to engage in "scientific early love", parents plan to bind their love partner from the child's junior high school, this does not sound very scientific what.
means that some parents find that their children are in early love, and both parents look pleasing to the eye, and directly say that the teacher should not interfere, as long as you don't delay your study. Some parents even start to walk around like relatives during the New Year's Day and give an extra copy of the New Year's Day money.
These Haidian parents regard their children's learning as their first priority, but why don't they regard puberty love as a scourge like their parents did?
On the one hand, because they are better than their parents after all, they know that it is impossible to block the relationship. The more you stop the child from doing things, the more interested the child may be.
On the other hand, as the bloggers said in the above picture, they are to preserve their class status. They have the right and knowledgeable children to fall in love and marry. It is better to encounter inappropriate things in the society in the future, resulting in asset outflow and class decline.
Therefore, it is called "Scientific Puppy Love".
sounds reasonable. After all, people who came to Beijing from a small place have gone through a lot of competition and screening. You can’t let your children help the poor on the issue of marriage and love, or you will have decades of experience. Efforts are wasted.
But if you think about it carefully, it's not right. The middle class is inherently dangerous, and it's a class of people who fall by accident. Behind their relatively decent life,It is the occupational pressure of hand-stopping and the anxiety of identity.
They then make the unfinished children find the right ones. How much difference will the children face in the future and their own current anxiety?
This kind of "internal digestion" itself is emptiness, because middle class itself has nothing worth keeping (a 70-year property right house is really not counted). What they have to do is to make progress, not to preserve.
From this point of view, "Scientific Puppy Love" is not as good as "Science".
2. Parents who are already middle-class financially, stop being poor in spirit.
People, you can't be too anxious. Once you get too anxious, you can easily do something you think you are.
There is indeed a lot of anxiety in the middle class. You cannot be lazy, and your children cannot lose.
Many of them are middle-class financially, but still poor in spirit.
They raise children based on gene continuity and emotional sustenance, not for experiencing life, and children cannot grow freely.
This of course stems from the lack of confidence in the middle class, "children without umbrellas must run hard."
is even more due to their non-recognition, children can also be ordinary people.
In recent years, many film and television dramas have taken the anxiety of raising children from the middle class to the extreme, such as the plots of "Span6span Tiger Mom Cat Dad " and "Little Parting",It is the reality script of the parents.
Once a white-collar executive mother posted an article called "A summer vacation with a monthly salary of 30,000 yuan", which aroused the resonance of many people. The interest class did not fall. Let the children try everything. After spending so much money and spending so much Duoli, how can he (she) help the poor when he or she is married? The worst should be stable in the middle class.
The problem is that if the child is not that piece of material, no matter how the parents ask him, the child will not be the person the parents want him to be.
Children are in love in the same way. Today, the objects they like, when they reach the age of marriage, may have no relationship long ago. Parents forcibly participate in the matchmaking. What is the difference with the arranged marriages in the past?
Children work hard, and it is possible to achieve class leaps in the future. Children are mediocre and class declines in minutes. It is not something that can be solved by who is engaged or married.
3. The middle class should not feel too good about themselves.
Whether there is a real middle class in China is a question of constant debate. But we say that China has many middle and affluent income groups, which is not controversial.
Why does this happen? Because the middle class does not only mean that the economy has reached a certain standard, it also includes multiple dimensions such as spiritual interest, ideology, and values.
There are too many people who meet the wealth index, but they are far behind in other aspects, so everyone is unwilling to admit that they are "middle class."
I think 's attitude towards raising children is also an indicator of whether the parents are middle-class enough.
Only to provide children with a good educational environment and sufficient financial support, but to educate them with old ideas and pass on their anxiety to the children, it is not "middle class" by itself, so what are you afraid of? What about the decline in class?
The movie " stunned ", tells a little girl from an average family and even a little poor, love at first sight to the newly moved neighbor boy. The boy is in a good family situation. The boy's father feels good about himself and looks down on the embarrassed girl's house. The boy also dislikes the eggs the girl sends.
The girl is independent, hardworking, understanding, and curious about the world. She often sits on a big tree and looks at the distant scenery, comprehending that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
The girl’s home is warm, even if there are quarrels between family members, they care about each other, the boy’s family is indifferent, the father is the patriarch, and the children are silent when they eat, and they don’t want to say how they feel.
The boy finally fell in love with the girl. According to the worldly concept, there is a high probability that the girl will climb the boy, but from another perspective, is it not the energetic girl that lights up the gloomy boy’s life and gives him Warm and beautiful?
Therefore, the "middle class" should not feel good about themselves, thinking that there is something to do to preserve their class status. Maybe the child with the wrong family and the wrong household is a more suitable future partner for your child.
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