Author: Ai Wen (emotional self-media person)
Many people are trapped in the pain of marriage, but they will never be able to get relief. Why?
Because they are hindered by marriage, they think marriage is the whole of life.
Marriage is of course important to a person's life happiness, but marriage cannot determine a person's life happiness. The simplest thing is, don’t you live a happy life alone before getting married?
Marriage requires two people to run together, so There is no secret to a happy marriage, it is just because the two people who are the same attentive.
Many people cannot solve the problem of marriage because they always place their hopes on each other, so they always encounter disappointment. He or she is never you. When you figure this out, you will not be so painful and entangled.
Of course, you have to work hard, give and bear to manage your marriage. However, you have to treat dead horse as a living horse. It is also a kind of dead head-on. It is not only futile, but also very self-abuse.
If you can, you can let go, if you can, you can break, and you will make contributions to an unworthy relationship and stick to a hopeless marriage. This is also a manifestation of wasting your life. If
cannot be released or cut off, then learn to accept reality!
At this time, what should you think and what should you do?
Your efforts may not make your marriage happy, but your efforts will definitely make your life happy!
You might say, how is it possible? ! My marriages are not happy, how can my life be happy?
Yes, you think so, it is precisely the root of your unhappiness, because you have completely built your happiness on marriage - assumptions, I'm just saying assumptions. If you don't have a marriage - whether it's never or suddenly there, are you still not alive?
So, Marriage is not the whole of life, and your happiness in life actually has many fulcrums.
You can achieve success in your work and career, you can gain emotions from friends or relatives, you can gain respect and recognition around you from your efforts and character, and you can gain a full sense of presence, value and happiness from your excellence.
And you have to build all this on marriage, on a marriage formed by someone who cannot give you happiness. Do you think you should blame yourself or rely on others?
You said, I understand the principles of , but I can’t do it!
Then this is another question: Since you understand the truth, why can’t you do it?
In fact, many times, it is not that you really can't do it, but that you never really want to do it - have you tried, have you tried hard, have you gritted your teeth and persevered?
If you don’t have any of these, why do you say that you will definitely not be able to do it.
It is certainly not easy to find your own happiness in an imperfect marriage, but it is definitely not as difficult as you think.
If you still don’t know what to do, then start with these changes:
1. Keep a regular life;
2. Stop when you think of unhappy things;
3. Put your time and energy into yourself;
4. Make more friends:
5. There is a hobby that can make you happy, such as yoga, fitness, jogging, writing, drawing, etc. It should not be difficult to do the above
. Start with these and persist for a month. I believe you agree with my statement.
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