This is the 919th real person we tell
I am Olga
(wedding photo)
1994, I was born in a small city in western Ukraine. My parents divorced when I was very young. I followed my mother and had no impression of my father.
Because my mother had to work, I grew up with my grandparents. Grandma is a capable and very wise woman. There is an old Chinese saying, "A good woman can flourish for three generations." Grandma is this type.
She attached great importance to education. She often tutored her mother and uncle when she was in school. Later, they both had good jobs and her mother became a nurse.
Grandma is very strict with me. When I was in school, if I didn’t get an A in the exam, I would be afraid of going home because I would definitely be criticized by my grandmother. At that time, I was very upset. Seeing that my friends had only B or C, but could go home happily, why couldn't I do it?
(when I was 3 years old)
Later, I went to China to study and had a better life. However, some friends faced various discomforts in their lives. Only then did I understand my grandmother’s good intentions and thank her for her strict teachings.
In fact, my grandmother is a person with a sharp tongue and a slander. If she doesn’t do well in the exam, she just scares me and won’t really hit me. Besides, my grandfather is very kind and always protects me whenever he or she is.
Ukraine's economic situation is not very good and its salary is low. My mother went to work in Italy when I was 5 years old.
My mother hasn't come back in the past three years and usually contacts by phone. Every time I talk, my mother doesn’t ask me how good my academic performance is, but only asks me if I’m doing well in school and how I feel.
Sometimes on holidays, she would ask the truck driver who has a good relationship with her to pick me up in Italy for more than a month, so I would also have a little Italian .
(I was about 11 years old)
Thanks to my grandmother’s careful teaching, in 2011, I was admitted to the prestigious Ukrainian school, , Kiev State Language University, , and majored in English.
Due to excellent grades, the school reduced tuition fees and paid living expenses, but in the first year, it was a very painful life. The teachers of
professional courses are too strict with us, and they also said that what we learned in the past was rubbish, but now they have to learn again, and they also require everyone to speak British English. If you accidentally say an American English word when answering a question, you may fail the final exam.
Teacher said that we should break all of us from head to toe and then reshape us. When I was a freshman, as long as I took professional courses, everyone would feel numb and tremble.
When we were in our sophomore year, we needed to learn a second foreign language. Schools generally asked to learn German and Spanish . However, German teachers are also ruthless and have very high requirements, so many people fail the subject, which leads to many people not wanting to choose.
(my parents)
At that time, the dean came to the class to talk to us and said that if he wanted, he could also learn Chinese in the second foreign language.
A strict English teacher has made us walk on thin ice. Everyone never wants to live such a life again, so they decisively chose Chinese.
Chinese teacher has been to Beijing and has studied in Harbin. When he was in class, he got along with us like a friend. During the process of learning Chinese, due to the large cultural differences, he often laughed in class.
The pronunciation of "做, 未" in Chinese is a swear word in Ukrainian . Although we all know that there is no negative meaning, when we start learning, everyone laughed so hard whenever we talked about similar words.
It is really difficult to learn Chinese. For us, German, Spanish and English are , Spanish , and it is not very laborious to learn.
(In high school, I was on the far right)
But Chinese and English are very different, so learning pinyin is difficult enough. Not only does it matter, there are many homophones, and sometimes it is impossible to tell which word to use. When I was in my senior year, my Chinese level was OK, and I had no problem reading and writing, but my listening skills were not very good and I was not very good at speaking.Although I learned Chinese at that time, I had no idea about China, and I would never have thought that I would study in China and marry there.
In order to have better development in the future, I want to take the postgraduate entrance examination. If I have good grades in the postgraduate entrance examination, I can go to school like in college without spending money, and my mother also hopes that I can continue my studies.
Once I went online, I accidentally saw a German company recruiting people. The company had Chinese customers, and they were usually rich families who wanted to find a tutor for their children and eat and live at home. The customer also provides tuition and living expenses for learning Chinese, and all procedures will be completed.
(Grandma and grandma and me)
I think the conditions given are very good, which is equivalent to free study and can also go abroad to see it, so I am very moved.
However, at that time I was afraid of meeting a fraud company, but the company showed me some photos of previous customers, introduced me to the family I was applying for, and saw the situation of their family through the video, which was indeed true.
I told my mother about this, but she was very opposed. The main reason is that she is worried. She still hopes that I can study for a postgraduate degree in Ukraine and then be a teacher more secure. After all, girls are too far away from home, and elders are worried. If there is something, their families will not be able to take care of them.
is in stalemate, and my mother made a concession and asked me to concentrate on taking the postgraduate entrance examination. If I pass, I will stay in Ukraine. If I fail the exam, I will go to China.
(me, mom and stepfather)
At that time, I had already made a decision in my mind, and I didn’t like the major of studying for a master’s degree, so I didn’t sign up for the exam at all. When my mother checked her grades, she didn't see my name. She was very angry when she learned about my actions and ignored me for two weeks.
At that time, my mother had a boyfriend, so she was my stepfather. I told him about the conflict with my mother and wanted my stepfather to help me persuade her.
He knew that in order to study medicine, his mother went to Latvia at the age of 15, and later she had better job opportunities. So I advised her that I am now an adult and want to pursue my own life. She should support me by letting go just like my grandparents back then.
With the stepfather's persuasion, my mother finally compromised. Grandpa and grandma have always loved me very much, so they also support my decision.
(When I was in Beijing)
In 2015, I came to Beijing, China and came out of Capital Airport . The moment I got on the bus, I felt very friendly because the surrounding buildings were similar to Ukraine.
However, when I saw towering buildings and some buildings with very Chinese characteristics in the city, I felt that this was another country. After receiving me, the person from the company took me to the school to complete the procedures and sent me to the client's home. The couple was a good man, with good English, and had a 6-year-old child in elementary school.
After everything was ready, I started to study and tutor.
Get up at 6 o'clock every morning. I took the bus to Beijing United University to take Chinese class, and followed the driver to pick up the child in the afternoon. After going home and finishing your meal, you will accompany your children to do homework, read animations or read books. If she encounters English problems, I will tutor her. At around 9 o'clock, I will write my Chinese homework again.
(our wedding photo)
is a newcomer, has no language, has no friends, and feels very lonely. The students who learned Chinese with me in the class were all foreign students from abroad. They came from South Korea, Thailand, Japan and other countries. I don’t know how to speak Chinese, they don’t know how to speak English, and I rarely communicate with my classmates.
Fortunately, the Chinese couple treated me very well and took good care of me in terms of food, clothing, housing and transportation. They would also care about me when they were sick. If I have any conflicts with my children, they will deal with them objectively and fairly, taking good care of my feelings.
Take your children out for fun during holidays and will take me with you. I have followed them to Singapore , Indonesia and other countries, and have also been to many cities in China. I am very grateful for this. The Chinese people are really enthusiastic and generous.
When she first came, the child was very shy and didn't dare to talk too much to me, but in just half a year, she could answer me well.Originally, the couple had only signed a contract with me for half a year, but seeing that I performed well, I renewed it for another year.
(my son)
came to China. In addition to this kind couple, I have also felt a lot of kindness in a strange city.
When I go shopping alone, I often get lost. As long as I ask for directions, no matter men, women, young and old, I will answer me patiently. If they don't know, they will use their mobile phone to check the route and then tell me how to go.
Once, a lady held my hand and sent me back enthusiastically. In fact, she is completely different from me. Maybe she thought that I was a foreigner and it was not easy to be in a foreign country, so she helped me enthusiastically.
Of course, as an Ukrainian , when I first arrived in China, I also had many things that I didn’t adapt to.
When I went out on the street, people often stared at me, or took photos of me secretly, and some people wanted to take photos with me. They said I was beautiful, with big eyes and white skin.
(I'm in Venice)
In fact, although I look average, no one will stare at me in Ukraine. Maybe there were not many foreigners in China at that time, so when I was on the subway or when I went out to play, I often heard people whispering: Look, foreigners.
In terms of diet, I don’t eat animal offal, chicken feet, stinky tofu, etc., and I still feel it is difficult to swallow it. However, there are too many Chinese delicacies. Apart from these, there are many other things I like, such as braised pork ribs.
Because I have no friends, in addition to shopping, I also spend time online. I didn’t expect to meet my current husband because of this.
He is a junior in China Airlines. He was born in 1990 and has 5 people in Qingdao. He has a good English language and works in Beijing. At that time, we were chatting online. We had a meal twice within three months of our relationship. We had a good impression of each other, but no one showed any further development.
(I am in Bali)
Half a year after we met, after New Year's Day in 2017, he suddenly asked me to watch a movie, and since then, he has started dating frequently.
After my mother found out, she didn't take it seriously. She felt that our cross-border love has a large cultural difference, and it may just be a matter of freshness and will not go to the end.
My boyfriend has the simplicity and kindness of a Shandong person, and he also respects me very much. When I was with him, I was very happy and I was willing to share with him if I had anything. During the relationship, I felt that he valued love and friendship and was also very responsible.
Since I met my boyfriend, I have not been a tutor. The couple felt it was a pity, but they also respected my choice. After all, I couldn't stay in their home all the time, and they would have to leave sooner or later.
(family portrait)
Later, I applied for a job in an Ukrainian Internet company, which specializes in teaching Ukrainian children English. It is relatively free, but due to the time difference, sometimes classes will be held until 1 a.m.
After a year in love, my boyfriend proposed to me. His parents liked me very much. When they first met, they treated me like their biological daughter.
My parents have traveled thousands of miles to China. After seeing him, they feel that he is down-to-earth and steady, not a playboy who lie to me, and they are also very satisfied with him.
Actually, my mother didn't want me to marry far away, but she and her biological father were both Ukrainians, and the marriage broke up early. Therefore, the short distance does not guarantee that the two can stay together forever, and they may not be unhappy even if they are thousands of miles apart. And seeing that I like him so much, I agreed.
(wedding scene)
Although both parents were very satisfied with us, they were still worried. Fortunately, they are all relatively open-minded and know that children cannot live their lives according to the wishes of their elders, so they held a wedding to us in 2018 and sent our most sincere blessings.
I didn’t expect that marriage customs would be so different from China.
Most Ukrainians are naked, and their parents will only support a small part of them. The couple rents a house and waits for their conditions to get better before buying a house and car.
The newlyweds hold weddings in the church. After the guests arrive, they take photos, eat, sing, dance, and play games together. They play until 4 o'clock in the evening, which is very enjoyable.
The whole process of the newcomers are not tired at all, they are very enjoyable, and they will not spend all their time and energy on entertaining guests, and there is no need to toast. The guests take the initiative to watch the newcomers with their glasses.
(I taught myself the illustration)
In China, parents support them more when they get married. At that time, my mother-in-law gave me a lot of money, and I was a little flattered. But we haven't moved, so we keep it for emergency use.
We held weddings according to Chinese customs at that time, and we wore bright red dresses and a wedding gift. It was my Ukrainian friend in China who came to give me it.
The wedding was very lively, with guests and no wedding incidents. Although the whole process was a bit tiring, I was very happy.
After marriage, my husband and I lived in Beijing. In the fall of 2019, my husband jumped from Air China and returned to Shandong and continued to be a flight attendant. I followed him back to Qingdao from Beijing. We and my mother-in-law live in different communities, which is a half-hour drive away.
Before getting married, a friend learned that I was going to marry in Shandong and carefully reminded me that my mother-in-law in Shandong is very powerful and asked me to think clearly.
(wedding scene)
and others got married and found that my mother-in-law was really amazing, but she was very nice to me.
Sometimes there are small conflicts with your husband, and the mother-in-law only criticizes her husband without asking the reason, regardless of who is right or wrong. If there is any problem between us, our in-laws and husbands will consider the problem from my perspective, and will never make me feel like an outsider.
Christmas and New Year's Day are very strong festivals in Ukraine. My mother-in-law will take care of my taste. Let's make a big table of delicious food that combines Chinese and Western styles.
When I celebrate the Spring Festival, I will also follow my husband to visit his relatives and friends. When preparing meals, relatives will consider my eating habits and specially prepare the Western food I like to eat.
(A big meal I made with my mother-in-law during the holidays)
Although my husband treats me very well, he is a straight man and doesn’t understand romance very much. But I know that I pay more attention to the sense of ritual and I will give me flowers and gifts on holidays. Sometimes I get angry and when I get home from get off work, I will buy me a cup of coffee to compensate me.
When he is on a business trip, he will bring me food and gadgets from all over the world. My makeup is basically bought by my husband at a duty-free shop, and he will tell me about strange stories he encountered during the flight.
Friends are mutual, husband and wife must be considerate of each other, and only when they go back and forth, the marriage can be managed well.
On my husband’s birthday, I will also prepare gifts for him, such as making him a cheesecake with my own hands.
(I made cheesecake for my husband on his birthday)
has been in China for 7 years. I have improved a lot in cooking and can also make Chinese hard dishes. Sometimes when you are alone at home, you will make a braised pork rib to reward yourself.
In April this year, our son was born. I am currently taking care of my child at home and waiting for the child to be about one year old before going to work. After having children, we still have a good relationship. However, sometimes he would blame me and devote all his time and energy to his children.
My husband and I think it is better to live alone after marriage, so we didn’t live with our parents-in-law. Even if we had a baby, we didn’t ask our mother-in-law to help us take care of it. But raising a child is a big project, so sometimes there is no time to care about your husband.
I am so tired of raising a baby alone. When I have time, I just want to have a good rest. But more often, everyone will understand each other. He will also take on housework after he returns home, and I will also pay attention to his mood.
(Climb the Great Wall with friends)
Life is now dull and fulfilling, and what worries me the most is the epidemic and war.
Due to the epidemic, flights have decreased, and my husband's income has dropped a lot. Fortunately, he still has some savings, is usually frugal, and can live a life.
Due to the impact of the epidemic, I haven’t been home for three years.I used to go home once or twice a year to see my grandparents. They are already octogenarians and cry because they miss me every time they call me. I feel very uncomfortable.
From toddler to college graduation, they all spent under the eyes of two elderly people. It was because of my grandparents that I was admitted to a prestigious school and went abroad to study, so I had my current lover and lived a good life. Still grateful for what they did for me.
I miss my family very much and hope that the epidemic will end soon. I will also bring my children back to Ukraine with my husband and I will accompany my grandparents and parents.
(Family’s first time coming to China)
In addition to the epidemic, what makes me worry about is war. When the Russian-Ukraine war broke out, I was still pregnant. I was trembling all over when I saw the news, and I was very scared.
Actually, my hometown is a small western town, not the main conflict place, and it is relatively safe. But the war is ruthless, and I am far away in China, so I am still very worried about my family.
As long as there is war, there are scenes of "after the countryside is deserted, the flesh and blood are displaced on the road", which makes it worrying to watch.
Although I live in China, most of my relatives and friends are in Ukraine. Even if they are not in danger of life, prices soar when they fight. I feel very uncomfortable when they hear them talking about the difficulties of life.
I also know that worry and anxiety cannot change anything. The only thing I can do is live your own life well and not let your relatives worry.
I hope the war will end soon, and there will be no war in Ukraine in the future. Like China, the mountains and rivers are safe and the world is safe. I only wish for peace in the world and my family to be healthy.
[Oral: Olga]
[Editor: Xinyue]
We cannot go through different lives, but we can feel the real stories of others here, and each story has real photos! If you like such a true story, please follow us! @Real Person Interview
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