is similar, it is your look, and he understands your thoughts.
is similar, you won’t quarrel because you don’t understand each other’s hobbies.
Similarly, you have endless topics to talk about and something you pursue together.
complementary means that you are angry in love and he is calm.
complementary means that he is irritable in love, but there is always one she can calm down.
complementary means that behind a person who is lost and misses, there is always a partner who is very big and small.
Is it better to be similar or complementary in love? This has always been a topic of debate. Many times, our understanding of this issue is not deep enough, and we don’t have to be obsessed with choosing one of two. Today we will talk about similarities and complementarity, and re-examine our love choice trends!
Both parties in love are similar, but in fact they are more helpful to the development of love
Many times, when our relatively unique views or hobbies are responded to, we will be very happy, which is the so-called "resonance".
Social psychologist Cole and others have found that a person's best friend is very similar to their educational level, economic conditions, social value, etc., which is the so-called equality.
Two people with similar views are more likely to attract each other. The two people will enter a positive and equal interaction, tolerant, accept and support each other. We can find a sense of security and belonging in each other, which further makes it easier for both parties to become lovers.
But similar relationships are not perfect and have disadvantages. The spark of love similar to the two people comes quickly, and the burnout period comes quickly. Over time, both parties already know each other well, and eventually lose their mystery and fade their passion.
Complementary personality is a good way to grow both parties
It is obvious that the complementary parties can learn from each other's strengths and weaknesses to a great extent, making the two people a constantly improving organic whole.
Each of us has two sides - the explicit side and the implicit side. When we meet a partner who stimulates our invisible personality, the suppressed excitement in our hearts will be aroused and show our unprecedented self. At the same time, the TA who is different from myself is also full of mystery.
However, complementarity is also limited, and good complementation must be gradually narrowed with the years within a controllable range. If the differences between the two people become more and more obvious, and the two people become more and more "complementary", it actually means that the differences between the two sides are too large and inappropriate.
More ideal state - the general direction is similar, the small details are complementary
The general direction is consistent, that is, the three views are consistent, so that the two sides will not have differences on important issues and key choices, and the two people’s inner views on many things will not be contrary.
Small details complement each other, which means many differences in behavioral habits and personality traits, such as one person is pessimistic and cautious, one person is optimistic and reckless; one person likes neatness and even has a bit of obsessive-compulsive disorder , one person focuses on the details in front of him; one person is outgoing and talkative, one person is calm and deliberate... These differences make each other full of mystery and promote the self-growth of lovers.
In a romantic relationship, both parties are often attracted first, discovered commonality, and then gradually discovered the differences. The ideal state is naturally just the same degree of similarity and complementarity, but this is hard to come by.
What we can do is not only to observe and think about the other person's characteristics, but also to start from ourselves, deeply understand our inner needs, understand the second self hidden in the dark, and clarify what we expect and what we lack.
Love is a beautiful thing. The lovers you protect each other for the rest of your life should naturally take the carefully selected choices seriously.But more importantly, we should understand that the person in front of you is as imperfect as you. If you can share happiness with each other and talk about the future, and the two of you move forward hand in hand and make progress together, it is perfect enough!
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