Traveling thousands of mountains and rivers, living in a breeze with a light wind and clouds. This kind of happiness is not something you can have just like you want.
However, some people can do it.
Recently, senior actress Jung Soo-jin posted a set of recent photos on her social account. In the photo, she is wearing a dark long dress with good texture, wearing makeup, and outstanding figure.
She is about to be in her fifth place, now she raises her son alone, lives a very free life, and is not inferior to that of a young artist at all.
Jung Soo-jin was once one of the four beauties in Singapore. She is a well-deserved finale in terms of beauty and fame.
But she looks very glorious, has experienced a series of bad things such as investment failure, being labeled as poor, her father's death, marriage breakdown, depression, etc.
But Zheng Xiuzhen did not let herself be decadent, but instead relied on her own strength to get out of the predicament step by step and live the happiness of life.
After going through thousands of sails and tragedies, why can she still "peach blossoms still smile in the spring breeze"? How should we define true happiness in
?
chases external happiness, short-lived
Philosopher Epicurus said that human nature is to seek happiness and avoid suffering.
Chasing and having happiness is actually the innate instinct of human beings.
Just, many people hurriedly chase happiness outward before they could figure out what happiness is.
Jung Soo-jin was born in an ordinary family in Singapore.
When she was a child, she was very well-behaved and obeyed her parents in everything at home.
also performed outstandingly in school, and teachers often praised her as a good child.
The beloved and her childhood is full of happiness.
After growing up, she has been working hard to chase more happiness from the outside world.
html When she was 120 years old, she participated in the talent show with the encouragement of her parents and won the championship in one fell swoop, thus forming an indissoluble bond with the entertainment industry.
995, Zheng Xiuzhen made her debut successfully with " Class 3 Theater " and got a lot of acting resources.
As the acting career became wider and wider, in 1998, Zheng Xiuzhen took on the role of "He Xiangu" in " Travels to the East HTML ".
Soon, this character became popular, making her the "most beautiful fairy girl" in the hearts of countless people, and also made her career reach its peak and won numerous awards.
All fame and fortune came towards her like a tide; and her diligent pursuit also received the rewards she deserved.
But in fact, true eternal happiness cannot be simply relied on the gift of the outside world.
The happiness of such a label with the "take-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it
000, after Zheng Xiuzhen finished filming "The Smiling, Proud Wanderer", her popularity soared wildly, and she once became a national treasure actor in Singapore.
Just when everything went smoothly, at the suggestion of a friend, she began to come into contact with stock trading.
She went from investing a little bit to investing more and more money, but ignored the huge risks in the stock market.
Because of the stock plummeting, she lost 1.5 million overnight.
Not long after, emotional flaws began to appear.
At that time, she had a beloved boyfriend and gave up many opportunities for filming for the other party.
But the other party treats her as an ATM and often comes to her for money under the excuses of entrepreneurship and investment.
She believed in her boyfriend again and again, and never expected that all the 400 million yuan she wanted to borrow had gone but never returned.
The boyfriend took away money and disappeared. For a moment, her infatuation and money were torn to pieces by the scam.
Jing Soo-jin slipped into the trough of her life for a moment, went completely bankrupt, and was sentenced to poor .
Since then, she has begun to pay off her debts, and the happiness brought by her past success has quietly gone away.
American psychologist Mihari Zixen Mihay wrote:
"People's pursuit of happiness is for happiness itself, and all other goals - health, money or power, are only valued when we think we will make ourselves happy."
If we do not believe in ourselves that we can be happy and do not have the ability to please ourselves, then the happiness obtained from the outside world is also shallow.
It will be like a "loft" made of loose sand. A little bit of wind and frost from the outside may bring a fatal blow to it.
The real happiness is to please yourself inward
After taking debts, Jung Soo-jin began to film hard day and night.
Tutorial work gradually drags down her body, making her faint on the road or on the set.
What's more unfortunate is that the debt has not been paid off yet, and in February 2004, the bad news of his father's death came again.
With the decline of Hong Kong film and television, celebrities can receive fewer and fewer dramas. On one hand, there is work pressure and debt repayment pressure. Jung Soo-jin is overwhelmed by the burden of life.
came from the outside world, causing her to collapse mentally. When she was severe, she suffered from depression and wanted to commit suicide several times.
It was also at this time that Jung Soo-jin received help from her relatives and friends, and they gave her the strength to start over.
Among them, the best actor Ma Jingtao invested to open a massage shop for Zheng Xiuzhen. The scale was small at the beginning and there were not many people, so she personally massaged the customers.
Although life was very hard, during this period, she met her ex-husband Huang Chuanxin.
After dating for three years, they registered to get married in 2010 and gave birth to a son Huang Zheng.
In those years, they always appeared in the public eye and looked sweet and happy.
Just when everyone thought they would be happy for a long time, in 2018, Zheng Xiuzhen announced her divorce on her personal social platform.
This time the relationship failure did not make her fall into excessive sadness. In her own words, it is:
"I know many friends will be surprised. Don't worry, my son and I are both very good. Although divorce is painful, the happiness of the past is real, and the happiness of having children is real. I want to keep these in my heart.
Happiness is never built on anyone. Only happiness can bring happiness to my lover... "
Her words are full of calmness and optimism. Zheng Xiuzhen has learned to find happiness from the heart.
After the divorce, Jung Soo-jin returned to being single, and she really knows how to please herself better than before.
She didn't mind the eyes of the outside world, continued to open a massage shop, worked hard to run her beauty career, took care of her son with her heart, took him around to travel, and enjoy a comfortable life.
At the same time, in life, she also maintains strict body management, outdoor cycling, indoor rock climbing, , no matter what, do it as long as you are interested.
For Zheng Xiuzhen, 23 years have passed, and at the age of 46, she looks more like the "free and easy" He Xiangu than before.
The past suffering may have made her suffer and doubted herself; but it also made her grow more compassion and stronger power from the inside after going through thousands of sails.
She found true value and happiness in constantly pleasing herself, and lived a strong, happy, calm and generous self.
The source of happiness will eventually be mined by you
Happiness is a positive emotion and the power to move forward.
We all yearn for and chase happiness.
But, what exactly is happiness?
Zheng Xiuzhen's transformation from finding out to pleasing herself inwardly explains the best answer to us:
Happiness built on the outside world is like a floating cloud, with too many variables that cannot bring us long-term and stable happiness.
Psychologist Bremer once said that The true happiness is inner and it can only be discovered in the human heart.
Only by deeply rooted in the inner world, learning to please yourself, and pursuing the joy deep in your heart is the most authentic happiness, so that you can truly feel happy and bring happiness to others.
This happiness rooted in one's inner self is more worthy of our whole life to cultivate.
So, how should we please ourselves?
. Be honest with emotions, learn to be self- empathetic
Why do we seek happiness outside or pretend to be happy?
Most of the time, it is because you encounter ups and downs or unhappy things and you are dishonest about your emotions.
The freedom of a baby lies in being able to express himself truly and freely.
We adults need to learn to discover and express emotions if we want true happiness and freedom.
For example, when a traumatic event occurs, you can notice your emotions in response to the event:
"How do I think about this?" "How can my pain be scored?"...
Then tell yourself: "If you want to cry, cry for a while." "As long as you can make yourself happy, do something else, it's OK"...
This is honesty of emotions and empathy for yourself.
When negative emotions are taken care of, they will naturally leave more territory for happiness.
. Establish positive cognition and re-narrate past trauma
There is an experiment in psychology. By tracking those who are paralyzed by accidents and those who suddenly become rich because they won the lottery prize, the results show that:
A few years later, those optimistic people are still optimistic after being paralyzed by accidents; while those pessimistic people are still pessimistic after suddenly becoming rich.
What determines whether we are happy depends not on what we have experienced, but on our own cognition.
By adjusting your cognition, you can also change your attitude towards life. How to adjust
? After the
event, you used to think about how bad the situation is and how unlucky you are.
Then, you can set up your own "positive quotes" now: "This is no big deal, many people have experienced it." "Register your mood and good luck will come soon"...
Then, set a fixed time period every day, and insist on practicing retelling them.
Over time, a series of positive thoughts will replace the previous negative thoughts, and your mentality will become more positive and sunny.
. Improve sense of self-efficacy , explore the source of inner happiness
American psychologist Bandura proposed the concept of "self-efficacy":
The more confident people are in their own advantages and skills, the better they can control their emotions and the higher their satisfaction with life.
The most reliable way to improve self-efficacy is that you truly experience a sense of accomplishment while completing a certain task and have the opportunity to experience this sense of accomplishment repeatedly.
At this time, you will naturally become more and more confident and happier.
Sociologist Li Yinhe Teacher said that happiness is the ultimate value of life.
Dear, I hope you can learn to please yourself, and the source of happiness will eventually be discovered by you.
planning | Liuji
edit | Qiuqiu
