In the summer of 2018, the college entrance examination failed as scheduled.
At that time, the grades could not even go to a better junior college, so I could only go to a very bad junior college in the local area (the kind that can be paid). In fact, I realized from the beginning that I couldn’t get the exam because my grades were not good since junior high school. High school was the worst class in the local worst school, and I was the worst student. On the eve of the college entrance examination, more than ten students in the class dropped out of school and went to work. At that time, I knew that I had no hope, and the rest of the time was just to continue to live and wait for the final result. You ask me why I didn’t work hard? Well, I also want to ask myself at that time that even if I worked harder, I could go to a slightly better junior college, even from other places, or even from a non-departmental major. But I didn't understand at that time. Even if I go back to the past and tell myself now, I shouldn't accept such advice.
is a bit far-reaching. Anyway, this is the case, I don’t plan to go to that bad junior college. My family kept advising me to repeat the school, but of course I would not agree at that time.
stayed at home for more than a month, staying in my room every day, browsing my phone and playing games, not wanting to communicate with my classmates and family, talking about which school to go to, and talking with my parents about repeating the school. I can only play games every day, keep calling, and keep calling, from full battery to out of power, from 10 am to 6 am the next morning, when I get tired of playing a game, I change the game and continue playing. My family started to care about me and Mei Shanyi at the beginning, and later I used violence to force me out.
At that time, I was rebellious, shameless, and even more ignorant. However, at that time, I also knew that it was impossible to continue to stay at home and play games. Of course, I was not what I hoped to go back to repeat the school. In anger, I went to work in the county town alone. My family is in the countryside, and it is more than ten kilometers away from the county town. I took the bus to the county town and lied to my parents that I had gone to Suzhou to work, but I actually didn’t have the courage at all. At that time, I only had more than 800 yuan, and more than 200 yuan was saved by myself. Some of them were secretly taken from my father’s wallet. I basically didn’t live in the county town. I don’t know how long it took for the more than 800 yuan to be used, and I don’t know if I can find a job. In fact, when I got on the bus, I started to regret it, but my willful thoughts still tied me up, and I had to swallow my stomach even if my teeth were broken. At that time, I just wanted to go black on this road.
In the county town, I spent 150 yuan on the first day. The prices here shocked me. I was also a person who had never worked to make money. I had no idea about money and would spend more if I was not careful. At that time, I felt the anxiety about money. I stayed in a multi-person hotel of 20 yuan at night (the kind that goes to bed) and couldn't sleep all night. I was thinking about how to find a job and how to talk to my boss during the job interview. Even at that time, I understood that no one would be so polite to you except my parents.
html Fortunately, I found a job on the third day. There was a printing shop in the back street of a shopping mall. The store was very small, with two computers and three printers. The door of the store was broken and the tiles in the store were scratched. Printing stores basically use simple business such as printing some A4/A3 files, and there are very few businesses. The more they are binding files. Although I was not good in high school, I was very familiar with Word, so it is certainly enough to do business in the printing store.
The boss opened me 1,200 yuan a month and made three meals. The boss made three meals for me in a small restaurant next to the printing shop. Every day, I could eat at that restaurant, and of course they were all cheap meals. And I happened to rent a house worth 350 yuan not far away, which was very small.
The salary is very low, but it is enough for me. I have almost no expense every month. Apart from the phone bill and the snacks I really can't stand the greed, there is no expense. A salary of 1,200 yuan may have no future for others, but for me, it is just that you are a means of escaping reality and escaping your family, which is enough.
printing store is very idle. Except for a few regular customers who print large batches of files every week, no one comes to visit. The boss seems to have several orders, and this printing store is just one of his many stores. The boss basically doesn't know how to be in the printing shop, but he just comes occasionally. When I was in the printing shop alone, I also connected to the WIFI in the store, and I just browse my phone endlessly. Day after day, I will hang up the calls from home, occasionally answering them, saying something like doing well.
The first time I paid my salary, I went to have a seafood buffet, which was 48 yuan. That day, I ate it from 2 pm to 4:30 pm. Two groups of people were changed on the table next door, but I was still there. It was the best meal I had ever eaten. At that time, I swear that I would come to have a seafood buffet every time I paid my salary.
(The front is the preparation, the main line below begins)
One ordinary afternoon, that was the first time I saw her. She had a not-high figure, short hair, a little fat, and she looked very good when she smiled. Her teeth were very white, but her appearance was not outstanding, especially her side-parted short hair, which was lifted up and hung on her ears, while hanging down almost blocking half of her face. She worked in an administrative work in a company not far away. At that time, I didn’t understand what administration was. I only knew that she had to print a lot of things every time, and sat for half a day.
kb0The boss of the company she works in and my boss knows me, so I just asked her to print everything she printed. She basically comes every two to three days, and she has to sit for a long time each time. First, the printer prints slowly, and second, many files are very messy and need to be debugged slowly.
She would chat with me during her time in the store. She was very talkative and seemed to have endless things to say. After chatting with her, I realized that she was 31 years old and unmarried. In fact, she didn't look like a person in her 30s. Her name is Wang Jie (not her real name, she has a mosaic here). Her hometown is from another province and she works alone here.
I thought that since a person went to another place, he should go to a larger city, but I didn’t expect that there were people from other places in such a small city.
She will also ask me some questions. I will certainly not tell her the truth if I want to leave her a good impression. I lied that I had been admitted to a junior college and was working in the summer vacation. She would often talk to me about topics at school. She said that she also missed her days at school.
The work demand made us fixed the meeting time two to three times a week, each time ranging from one or two hours or half a day. There was very little business in the store, and no one often came to disturb us. We had a very happy chat every time we met, and the relationship between her and I gradually became intimate. Later, she would bring me something every time she came, bring me some lunch when she came, and bring me milk tea or snacks when she came in the afternoon. I was like the beloved child at home, waiting for the souvenirs when my neighbors visited.
That time she came to the store very early at noon. When I returned to the printing store after lunch from next door, she was already sitting on the stool in the store, with her back facing the door and playing with her mobile phone. I wanted to make a prank and scare her from behind. I tiptoed to approach from behind, gently lifted up her short hair on the side, and wanted to blow a breath into her ear.
When I lifted my hair, I regretted it and I shouldn't have done this.
What is covered under the hair is a deformed ear. There is no auricle on the ear, only a small bulge. A blue-gray birthmark spreads from the back of the scalp to wrap the fragile ear. It seems to be a painful place that makes people difficult to approach. If you breathe at her, it will make her pierce the heart like thousands of arrows.
I let go of my hand and returned to the work station. I didn't say anything. A minute later, I told her about printing, and then it was the normal printing work. She sat behind me. I didn't dare to look back at her expression. Is she angry? Or distress or sadness? I didn't know that I didn't have the courage to look back at her at that time. We had almost nothing to talk about this afternoon, the atmosphere was depressing and awkward, and we didn't say a few words except for printing, and we didn't mention the deformed ears again.
The next time she came to the printing shop, it seemed like that nothing had happened between us. The conversation returned to what it was before, and at that time I even felt that what had happened before was a dream.
That day she went to print the file again. This time she organized the file for a long time, and the printer kept jammed. She would basically get stuck after printing more than a dozen pieces. We kept getting it in the printing shop until around 8 o'clock in the evening. There was basically no one on the street. There were only me and she and the printer that I had worked for a day. She took the initiative to speak and told me about her ears. Her ears were born deformed. Although there was no problem with hearing, they were not beautiful in appearance, so she used her hair to cover it. Since she was a child, she was discriminated against by her teachers and classmates because of her ears. She would laugh at her as an ear in the animation "Black Cat Sheriff". In high school, she had to take photos of her ears without crowns because of the exam. Unexpectedly, that photo has been following her throughout high school. Most of the blind dates later failed because of this ear.
For the ear, she said silently for a long time. I didn't answer or agree. I just listened quietly, and the sound of the printer "squeaking~" accompanied her, from the calm narration at the beginning to the gradual loss of control of emotions, then sobbing and crying, and in the end, only whimpering was left.
I didn't say anything, nor did I comfort her. But with the sound of the printer "squeaking~", I sat beside her and hugged her. She also leaned towards me, and we hugged her tighter and tighter. I lifted her hair and kissed her deformed ear.
"I think she is very cute."
that night we established a relationship between men and women, and she is 13 years older than me. It sounds like there is no idea, that is, I was just born when she was 13 years old.
At around nine o'clock in the evening, we finished printing all the documents. She rode an electric bike to take me home. When I arrived downstairs of the rental house, I kissed her and kissed her for a long time. At that time, I naively thought that if I kissed her, I would be with her forever.
