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Feng ShaofengDuring 2 weeks of divorce, starting a blind date and starting a new relationship is a good medicine to forget your ex?
Recently, a Taiwan media reported that Feng Shaofeng and Zhao Liying divorced less than 2 weeks ago, and his parents began to actively help him find a blind date, hoping to let his son settle down again through blind date.
Failure of marriage management, both parties are responsible. Celebrities are richer than us and have more capital for divorce, but in the face of emotional management, having money does not mean having the ability to manage relationships.
Less gatherings may be an excuse for divorce, but it is definitely not a reason for marriage failure.
Feng Shaofeng's parents believe that quickly helping their son start a new relationship can make him forget the pain. This view is not wrong in itself.
It seems that starting a new relationship quickly can make you forget your ex and the pain, but it turns out that if you can't grow in a failed marriage, then blindly launching the next relationship will only make you more painful.
Harvard social psychologist Daniel Wegener proposed the white bear effect also known as the white elephant effect, rebound effect He asked the participants to try not to imagine a white bear. As a result, people's thinking rebounded strongly. Everyone Soon the image of a white bear came to mind.
This experiment shows that the more you don't do or remember things, the more you do and the more you recall, this is actually the "white bear effect" in psychology .
Therefore, the method of forcing yourself to heal old wounds by starting a new relationship is not an option. The only way to forget your ex is to let yourself grow, let yourself suffer, keep yourself busy and even stronger, and meet a better version of yourself.
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After the breakup, he quickly started the next relationship
Psychological research shows that 73% of men will quickly start the next relationship after a breakup, but 87% of these new relationships will not exceed 1 month.
Why, because has been with for a long time, the shadow of your ex will reappear in your life. If you do not deal with him well, he will always haunt you.
He will pop into your mind when you are eating, sleeping, and even when you go to the toilet. If the incumbent is slightly inferior to her, your picky brain cells will come out to make trouble.
You will despise your incumbent, her sloppy, unsentimental, is not aggressive . And these are the flaws your ex once despised about you.
You'll miss your ex so much, and that's when you realize how ridiculous your quick-start relationship was.
Love and marriage both need to be managed, and ultimately rely on yourself to get along with yourself. If you can't let yourself grow in marriage, then you will definitely be covered with bruises and .
The most terrible thing is that you still do not repent even after you are covered in bruises and bruises, and continue to look for your sustenance in the next relationship. In fact, you will find nothing but loneliness and infinite regret.
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Find yourself, treat your partner well, painstakingly manage marriage is the key to happiness
When encountering difficulties, find a way to communicate and solve it, rather than simply and rudely divorce and replace people.Maybe divorce and replacement can solve the temporary dilemma, but what about the next marriage? Is it over yet?
Marriage is the best place to practice in the world. Learning to love, learn to speak, learn to deal with relationships, and grow yourself in the process is the key to a happy marriage.