Recommended: If a person wants to spend his old age safely and steadily, he must learn to be reserved, even for his own children.
In life, the reason why many elderly people feel more tired after retirement is mainly because they interfere too much in their children's lives, and even help their children without reservation. They always think that without the help of their parents, their children will not be able to survive.
But in fact, this idea and practice are wrong.
We suggest that even if the elderly have money after retirement, it is best to judge the situation and distinguish right from wrong when it comes to helping their children.
Because, only if the elderly help the ones they should help can they benefit their children and they will also end up with personal favors; on the contrary, if they help their children "overwhelm", it is not beneficial to their children, but to harm them. It is best not to do such things.
When people get old, no matter how good their relationship with their children, they must not do these 5 stupid things. Older friends must pay attention!
First: Don’t tell your children about their real deposits.
When people get old, they will find that deposits are the most reliable and least likely to cause changes, not their children. After all, in real life, it is not uncommon for children to rely on their parents. The elderly must not use money to test human nature.
If the elderly do not have a lot of deposits, then it is recommended that you answer the questions of your children by making a secret.
Because of doing this, your children will imagine that your deposit is "unfathomable" and you will not dare to neglect you in your life in the future. If the elderly have more deposits, don't disclose it to their children, so that you can help freely when your children are in trouble.
For this, you might as well imagine: if your children know your real deposit, but when they have difficulties, and you do not try your best to help them, then in their hearts, they will think that you are not really trying to help. In this way, paying money will end up badly, and it will also destroy the relationship with children.
So, don’t let your children know about their savings, it’s the best choice.
The second one: Don’t use money to subsidize your children without any bottom line.
In life, there are many dependents who unscrupulously plunder their parents' savings without scrupulously and do not want to work. Faced with this situation, parents should never choose to help them, because this kind of bottomless help will actually harm your children.
When you are old and leave, who will help your children who live by leniency? Therefore, no matter how rich the elderly are, they must not help their children excessively.
The third one: Don’t overly assume responsibilities that originally belong to your children.
After children get married and start a business, they need to take on the heavy responsibility of family development. Many elderly people are always afraid that their children will live a bad life, so they help their children withstand a lot of pressure. In fact, this is wrong.
The so-called emergency rescue but not poverty. Parents should do this even more to their children. Never raise their children into "giant babies".
The fourth one: Don’t spend all your savings for your children.
After people get old, various diseases gradually emerge, and there are many places that require money. Therefore, it is best for the elderly not to spend all their savings to help their children, especially when buying a house or a car. They should let their children find ways to do it themselves, and there must be limits to help, leaving room for themselves.
Otherwise, if you need money when you are sick, then turn around and ask your children for it. That will be difficult. If you don’t do it well, it will cause a lot of trouble and cause family conflicts.
The fifth one: Don’t sell the old house, buy a new house for your children to live in together.
Whether it is a golden nest or a silver nest, it cannot replace the nest. Therefore, don’t lose your nest in order to help your children buy a larger house.
When people get old, they must know how to leave a way out for themselves. The most basic thing is to have a house under their own name.Because when people get old, many things are beyond your control. If your daughter's attitude towards you changes, or if your daughter-in-law dislikes you for being old and unable to move, you may be "swept out" and sent directly to the nursing home, rather than asking a nanny to serve you at home.
This situation is quite common in life, so it is recommended that the elderly be cautious about "selling old houses and buying new houses".
I wonder what you think about this?