Raising children is a matter of happiness and troubles coexist. Some children were obviously very obedient when they were young, but now they are getting older and less obedient, which makes many parents feel very troubled.

Do you also have a headache about your child’s disobedience? Some troubles encountered in educating children?

It is said to children repeatedly that they are not repentant. The same method will work for others, so that it will not work for their own children?

Do you need to use tough measures to make the child obedient?

"How many times have you told me about this? Why do you still not change it?" "Have you finished doing your homework?" Are these questions you often ask? Raising children is a matter of happiness and troubles coexist. Some children were obviously very obedient when they were young, but now they are getting older and less obedient, which makes many parents feel very troubled.

Sometimes they even talk back to their parents, do things that deliberately make their parents angry, and fight against their parents everywhere. It is obviously something good to them, but they will also let them go against their parents.

For example: children do things that can be done in the morning, so they have to be delayed until the evening. Every 10 o'clock in the evening, the child still can't finish his homework, and playing with his mobile phone while doing his homework. The parents were very angry and scolded the child for "If you can't finish his homework, don't sleep."

In fact, parents want their children to finish their homework quickly before saying anything, but the child will feel particularly impatient and even throw a tantrum and stop writing directly;

Another example, when parents go out to work in the morning, they ask their children to clean the house. At this time, the child did not respond. The parents thought that their children would clean the house, but after they got home at night, they saw that the hygiene was not cleaned. The child lay on the sofa and played with his mobile phone, and created more garbage. The parents became irritable, scolding and even beating the child.

enables the child to complete the tasks he assigned. Many children will be frightened by the emotions of their parents and become less willing to do what the parents say, which has a negative impact.

When the child is disobedient, we should know that beating and scolding children cannot fundamentally solve the problem. This will only make your parent-child relationship weaker, making your child disgusted or even feared you.

When the child is beaten, he seems to have become obedient, but he feels a certain hatred for you in his heart. This has been done for a long time, and the problem cannot be solved correctly. Frequent beating and scolding the child will cause a psychological shadow and become more rebellious, leading to the child making more serious mistakes in the future.

How should we guide and educate our children correctly?

1. Communicate more with your children and avoid scolding them

When the children are disobedient, we cannot scold the children when they come up. This will make things worse and cause the children to become more disobedient.

We should communicate with our children, be patient, understand the reasons, let the children express their true feelings in their hearts, and guide them correctly, so that they can correctly solve and handle the problems.

2. Reflect on yourself

When we ask our children to do something, we must first think about whether we can complete this thing, or that our wrong behavior has affected the child, such as: asking the child not to watch TV and go into the house to do homework.

Suppose we are still lying on the sofa and continue watching TV or playing with mobile phones, so that the child will feel unfair. Why can you watch TV, but I can't watch it, and I have to do my homework, which will make the child feel negative, which will lead to the child becoming disobedient.

3. Another way to ask the child to

When we ask the child to do something, do we carry the tone of "instructions"? This tone will make the child very uncomfortable, thus causing resistance and becoming disobedient. At this time, we can change the tone to ask the child, demand the child in a tactful way, and let the child do something in an encouragement way, so as to avoid the above situation.

If you have troubles or troubles about parent-child relationships and your original family, then you are welcome to Yuhehai Education for consultation: 400-1185-985.

We are committed to helping parents improve parent-child relationships and improve their self-growth. The plan is based on a large number of clinical consultations and case interviews to extract common problems from them and seek effective solutions in specific scenarios.

Yuhehai Education is an institution focusing on psychological counseling for adolescents. Over the past 7 years, it has provided high-quality services to more than 35,000 families. The exclusively developed "concentric circles and family education ecosystem" has been upgraded to the sixth generation; the "581 dual-system dynamic adjustment method" based on "concentric circles" has received high praise from a large number of parents.

The predecessor of Yuhehai Education was the "Fish and Hai Psychological Exchange Group" established in 2015. The eight co-sponsors are leaders in the education industry, primary and secondary school teachers, college teachers, hospital psychiatrists, and psychological counseling industry experts. The studio was later established and it was operated in 2019. The research center is located in Beijing and the operation center is set up in Zhengzhou.

Yuhehai Education has always attached great importance to product research and development. Its subsidiary [Yuhehai Family Education Research Center] holds regular product seminars, and the seminars have reached hundreds of sessions. At the same time, the center cooperated with universities and invited many professors of psychology and doctoral students from universities to serve as researchers.

Yuhehai Education was earlier exploring the "offline + online" guidance model, and became a pioneer in the "full process online consultation" in the field of adolescent psychology in March 2020. Online guidance services launched due to the sudden outbreak of the epidemic are very popular due to their privacy, convenience and efficiency. They have unique advantages and have achieved significantly better guidance than offline guidance.

◎Adhere to refined services. In 2020, Yuhehai launched the "2020-2025 Fine Refinement Project", proposing that before 2025, "only serve 3,000 families per year."

◎Persist in action with warmth. In 2016, "Yuhehai Charity" was established. Over the past six years, "Yuhehai Charity" has affected more than 1,000 families and has reached more than 10,000 children in total.

◎Continuously output original content. Up to now, various media platforms under Yuhehai Education have published more than 200 original youth psychology popular science articles, 90 Zhihu answers, and 30 science popular science videos, with a total reading volume exceeding one million.