When a child wants to give up, he must help him learn to persevere. This is to be responsible for the future of his child.
01
"I'm not sensible, are you guys not sensible?"
Day:
Children: I don't want to learn dancing anymore?
Father: Why?
Children: Dance is too tiring, I have to practice basic skills every day, I want to learn to sing.
Father: OK, then learn what you like.
One month later:
Children: I don’t want to learn to sing anymore.
Father: What's wrong?
Child: My voice is hoarse, but I still can’t sing well, I want to go out and play.
Father: Forget it, the child is still young, so he should play at this age. Mom and Dad won’t force you.
Ten years later:
Teacher: We are going to hold a New Year's Day party, and everyone must sign up for a program.
Children: Teacher, I can’t do anything.
Teacher: Then you are responsible for sweeping the floor and cleaning it!
Father: The New Year’s Day party is very exciting, why didn’t you show off?
child: I don’t know anything, how can I get on stage? Why didn’t you cultivate a hobby for me?
Father: You didn’t want to go at the beginning, how could we blame us for not cultivating you?
Children: I don’t want to learn, so you won’t let me learn? I am young and ignorant, are you also sensible?
My father was speechless.
I believe this is a conversation that many families will encounter.
How to cultivate children's interests?
is it that "respects" the child's opinions, or is it that the child is complaining about in the end?
02
"Why didn't I force my child to do it?"
It is said that 99% of children have said to their parents: I don't want to learn anymore.
Of course, we have to admit that more than 99% of children do not want to learn, and even 99% of adults do not want to learn.
"loves learning", it may be more in line with the nature of children.
But can we "respect" children's opinions because of this?
cannot!
because this is a manifestation of irresponsibleness for the future of children.
A study in the United States found that What determines a child's future is not IQ, but persistence.
But the child is still young, how can he know so many truths?
Children can only see the happiness in front of them, and they don’t know how many hardships and hardships people who don’t study will endure in the future.
If even we easily let the child back down at this time, the child may regret it in the future, regretting why he failed to grit his teeth and persevere.
We will also blame ourselves for our own guilt, why didn’t we force our children to do it?
03
Children have no long-term vision, but parents should have
American economist James J. Hermann, who used econometric to prove that
investment in children's early education has the highest return rate.
Invest 1 yuan for children 0-3, and there will be a return of 18 yuan; invest 1 yuan for children aged 3-4, and there will be a return of 7 yuan; invest 1 yuan in primary school, and there will be a return of 3 yuan; in college, investment 1 yuan is only a return of 1 yuan;
son of gambling king , He Youjun is a best example.
Some people say: He Youjun is a pride of heaven who "holds the golden key" since he was born, and he will never have to worry about food and drink for the rest of his life.
But he didn't choose to enjoy it, and he didn't have the pleasure of being a sensual, bright and beautiful woman all day long.
He chose to study hard and was admitted to the Ivy League school in the United States - MIT , and also obtained a master's degree.
He Youjun not only has excellent grades, but also treats people kindly, completely different from those ignorant playboys. How do children like
educate them?
He Youjun's father often said:
"I teach children to work hard. Wealth may not be with you for the rest of your life, but knowledge will always benefit."
Children, when you grow up, you will know that there is something more important in this world than making money, which is a person's spiritual world.
Study hard and enrich the inner world is to help you shape your own better cultivation and character and achieve a better self.
04
Children do not have concentration, but parents must have
Mr. Ye Shengtao said: "What is education? To put it simply, it only takes one sentence to cultivate good habits."
Some parents enrolled their children in interest classes worth tens of thousands of yuan, but in the end they still had no effect.
A mother whose child was admitted to Tsinghua told everyone: "When tutoring children's homework, I will accompany them and study with their children."
Some parents will say: "I'm here too. As soon as the child does his homework, I will watch him."
First ask all parents, have you done the following?
Do you not watch the video loudly when your child is doing homework? When your child is humorous, don’t you browse Douyin? When your child is reviewing, don’t you go to parties or play?
Many parents also accompany their children to do their homework, but they are just formal companions. In fact, parents are not sure how much homework their children have and how difficult their homework is.
The fundamental reason for children not to learn is that they encounter difficulties. The more they learn, the more frustrated they become. The more frustrated they like to think about something else, and they are not focused, which leads to a vicious cycle.
And parents only need to do one thing: accompany him to solve what he learned that day every night.
Ask your child every day:
How much homework does each subject have today? What are the difficulties in each subject? How do children want to buy it? Which subject does the child want to start?
If the child is in a very full state, then do it first, difficult first and easy, and improve the efficiency of doing homework.
If the state is very tired, then do some mechanical homework first. It doesn’t take too much effort. Wait until the child enters the state and then inserts it more difficult.
In this process, only one requirement is made to the child, that is, focus.
This half hour does this part of the homework, concentrate on doing it, let go after finishing it, and do something else.
has no time to change it for you. You will do it after thinking about it. Don’t rush to do the next lesson after finishing it, and concentrate on checking.
05
Children have no self-control, but parents must have
Roman Rolland once said that the most terrible enemy is the lack of firm belief.
If parents do not help their children shape such beliefs since childhood, then who can help them when they grow up?
Yang Yi was the top scorer in science in the college entrance examination and was admitted to Tsinghua University . Both undergraduate and master's degree were enrolled in Tsinghua University. What is more dazzling than education is: In January 2018, Yang Yi stood out in a variety show "'s most powerful brain " that gathered countless academic masters. He entered the top 12, and helped his team win the championship with almost zero mistakes. He became the champion of this competition and was finally awarded the title of " Brain King ".
Our "global brain king" Yang Yi once said to his mother.
"I was in the third grade of elementary school at that time. One night when I was doing my homework, I saw my neighbor's children gathered to play football. I was doing a math problem and I had already made three mistakes."
"I felt very discouraged. I didn't want to do these extra homework. I wanted to go out to play football."
So he said to his mother, "Mom, I don't want to learn anymore."
Later, when I was having supper, Yang Yi's mother said this:
"It is normal to know how to do a question and don't want to do it anymore, but many things need to be learned more than just to learn. If you don't study, encounter this question during exams or competitions, you can only think about it. I could have learned it at that time, I could have scored 100 points, do you want to do this?"
The pain and regrets in life often do not come from "failure", but "I could have".
If Yang Yi’s mother did not strictly discipline her children at that time, where would she be the current “brain king”?
The famous CCTV host Dong Qing , who hosted the China Poetry Conference, also thought about not studying when he was a child.
But her parents kept asking her to persevere, and she gritted her teeth and persevered.
Until today, she has been very eloquent and intellectually elegant, becoming an intellectual goddess in the hearts of millions of people.
She said she thanked her parents for forcing her to study back then.
No matter what you do, it is like this - it is easy to give up, but it is difficult to persevere. What class to learn is not important. It is most important to teach children to learn to persevere from elementary school and to cultivate children's ability to grow in setbacks.
Good study habits will benefit you for life.
In fact, as long as you pay a little attention to those who are outstanding in various fields, you will find that they are not smarter than who is or who is richer than who is, but they know the principle of persistence in learning.
Don't let your children choose to enjoy at the age when they should work hardest.
"Dynamic: How to Become a Very Awesome Person" has this passage:
There are many things in this world that are short, flat and fast, and immediate returns will be rewarded, and there are also many things that require long-term investment and unswerving persistence to achieve great success. However, people often flock to the former type, but people avoid the latter type. The passage of
applies to both children and every adult.
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