From the time my children are young, I will consciously train them to do housework, asking them to pack away their toys and tidy their rooms. When they grow older, I will ask them to wash dishes and mop the floor. I think this is to cultivate children's sense of responsibility, especially to their families.
And child psychology expert Ginot believes that doing housework is useful for running a family, but has no positive impact on cultivating a sense of responsibility. Even forcing children to do housework has a negative impact on shaping their character.
Cultivate children's sense of responsibility. Instead of forcing him to obey, it is better to transmit values to him. Because a child's sense of responsibility can only arise from his heart and be slowly cultivated and guided by the values of family and society. The specific implementation of
into family education mainly focuses on two aspects: one is the attitude of parents towards their children; the other is the children's own practice in real life.
1. Education with a sense of responsibility, teaching by example is greater than words
Moral education is difficult to express through language and can only be influenced through behavior. This requires us to have a good parent-child relationship with our children. Because children will always imitate their idols, consciously or unconsciously. Therefore, we should pay attention to the following three points when getting along with our children:
1. Accept and identify with the children's emotions
For example: some parents see their children elongating their faces for no reason, and they get angry and want to teach their children a lesson. It makes the children even more unhappy and the parents themselves are also annoyed.
But if the first thing a parent thinks of is: The child has encountered something unhappy, then he will say to the child: You look very unhappy. At this time, it is best not to ask: "What's wrong with you? You look angry."
Because questions express curiosity and declarative sentences express sympathy.
No matter what emotions or feelings our children have, we must first accept and acknowledge them. It will be much easier for us to correct the child's behavior after he has calmed down.
2. Listen carefully to your children's thoughts and opinions
Parents who listen carefully to their children's thoughts and opinions will make their children feel that they are very important, which will bring them self-esteem.
Children who are not paid attention to by their parents will feel that they are unlovable and unloved. This kind of psychological trauma may stay with the child for a lifetime.
3. Do not characterize or label children
Xiaomei was scraping a large box of ice cream that her mother had just bought into her bowl. Her mother saw it and said, "Xiaomei, there are four people in our family, so we need to divide it into four." ”
What this mother did is commendable. She didn't say Xiaomei was selfish or accuse her of only thinking about herself. Because she knows that negative comments from parents can distort children's self-image.
If a child has experienced the polite attitude of his parents for a long time, he will imitate it. In this way, parents have completed more than half of the education of their children's sense of responsibility, but it is not enough to have role models. They must also rely on their children to work hard and practice in life.
2. Give children the opportunity to solve problems on their own
Haohao is a boy in sixth grade, and he is usually a little careless. On this day, the school organized a spring outing, and he forgot to bring a commitment letter signed by his mother. The teacher said that if I didn’t hand in the commitment letter, I couldn’t go on the spring outing. Haohao was anxious and called his mother to send him to school.
His mother thought for a moment and said to him: "I have something to do now and can't leave. You should go home and get it yourself."
Haohao said: "It's too late, the teacher and classmates have to leave."
Mom continued to guide: "Then do you know how to get to the spring outing? I remember you can get there by taking a bus."
Haohao said angrily: "That's too much trouble, I won't go."
Mom said calmly: " Whether you go or not is your own decision."
Haohao hung up the phone. He thought for a while, then went home to get the letter of commitment, and then took the bus to the park where he went for spring outing, where he played with his classmates.
The clever thing about this mother is that she does not blame her children when they encounter problems. Instead, use this opportunity to help children learn to solve problems and take responsibility.
believes that through this incident, Haohao will not only gradually reduce his neglectful behavior, but also realize that he should be able to take responsibility for himself.
In daily life, if things completely fall within the scope of the child's responsibility, the child has the right to choose. For example, when Haohao goes on a spring outing, his mother lets him choose whether he wants to go or not. If he wants to go, he has to find a way to go.
It falls within the scope of the parents' responsibilities, but the children's interests are affected. The children have the right to speak and have no choice. right. Of course, when the decision lies with the parents, we must also tell the children what will happen next and help them accept it.
In short, if parents do not allow their children to have a say or even some decision-making rights within their own responsibilities, it will be difficult to cultivate responsible children.
Cultivating children's sense of responsibility does not happen overnight. Parents must first be patient, accept and recognize their children's emotions, listen to their children's ideas, respect their children, and not label their children. When encountering problems, learn to let go appropriately and let the children solve the problems on their own. I believe that time will definitely give us a responsible child.
