Text/Mu Ying Gongzi
This chess game in life is sometimes determined by the pattern. It determines a person's vision and will also affect a person's life, especially women.
The so-called pattern refers to the scope of cognition of things. If you have a big pattern, you will have a broader vision. Just as Mr. Yu Qiuyu said, "When a person has a big pattern, he will not sink into the trivialities of life."
stands on the first floor, and hears gossip; stands on the one hundred floors, and you can only see the scenery in your eyes.
The reason why a person is in pain is because he has no height and is not high enough. All he sees is a chicken feather all over the ground. If a woman lets herself sink into trivialities, her life will definitely not be smooth. A woman who can not cry or make trouble in these three things means she is really wise.
1: It is too simple to suffer the injustice of the unjust
Slander a woman. As long as you say she is not serious and then add fuel to the fire and make up her private life. If that woman happens to be beautiful and free, then everyone will help you slander her.
And when one day, that woman becomes you, what will you do when facing all kinds of malicious misunderstandings from the outside world?
When many people face this dilemma, the first word that pops up in their minds is "resistance". A small number of people choose to solve it by crying. In fact, neither the former nor the latter can break this dilemma.
The word "resistance" sounds very comfortable. It means never bowing your head, it means being proud, bravery and tenacity, but there are arrows around you. Ask yourself: Can you really resist? And when resistance cannot solve the problem, are tears and noisy really useful?
Life is always full of changes, and plans can never keep up with changes. We will always encounter big and small things. Many times things themselves are not serious, and our panic will expand the situation.
The best counterattack for suffering an unjust injustice is actually four words: "Disregardless", which translates to "What does it have to do with you?", "What does it have to do with me?", and then act recklessly and continue to do what you should do - focus on yourself, improve your mind, and analyze the reasons for the rumors.
It is annoying to suffer unjust grievances, but it is even worse to encounter rumors, but crying and making trouble, and tearing people apart will only make the situation even more ugly. Smart women will never use emotions to solve problems.
2: Facing major setbacks
It is not scary to encounter major setbacks. What is scary is the vision of others and the standards of the world. When most people face major setbacks, they will only think of two ways. One is to give up crying and making a fuss, and the other is to cheer up when the building is about to fall.
Whether it is giving up or cheering up, it is actually useless in many cases. Give up makes us lose our can and cheer up just to prepare for the next time. Smart women will open up the third way of thinking: thinking.
Before the next difficulty comes, you might as well ask yourself two questions: Is this pain and setback independent value? What should you do? From the front to the back is the process of thinking, and this is also the process of "accepting finiteness".
admit and accept that not so perfect self, try to balance this emotion, convince yourself that "it's okay, it's not a big problem if you mess it up", and let yourself relax, rather than be dominated and occupied by bad emotions.
When we were young, we would cry because we failed the exam, and when we grew up, we would question ourselves because of failure in work. Many times we would look back and look at it. In fact, those nights that could not sleep all night, the so-called suffering, are not that difficult.
So all past experiences tell us: the threshold for suffering will extend infinitely as suffering deepens, and we will never be able to predict the future, so we experience suffering, overcome suffering, and then grow.
The heaviness of life comes from thinking after pain. It is not just rushing forward blindly, nor is it sitting in place waiting for someone to pull you forward. Only by allowing everything to happen can you find the real direction, and then you can cheer up and rush to the road.
will be rewarded when working hard, which should be our motto in life, but at the same time, we must admit that the possibility of hard work will not be rewarded. First, let everything happen, then be fearless.
3: Encountering betrayal of your lover
In all the sufferings, "betrayal" is the most difficult wound to face and heal. We need to resolve the psychological needs and actual contradictions after encountering betrayal, and we also need to reshape and satisfy ourselves. This is a self-regulation process from the inside out, so it will not take one or two days.
When a woman is betrayed, she will have the upper hand compared to anger, questioning and internal friction will gain more prevalence. Therefore, most people cannot reach the first level of self-healing, but fall to the moment when the dawn disappears. The reason why
cannot face it is because we have cognitive errors: the person who once said that he loved you, protected you, and took care of your partner, became the one who got off the bus first. They didn’t even say goodbye, but secretly changed to another car while you were asleep, and then after waking up, you naturally formed cognitive errors such as “Are I not good enough” and “I am not attractive enough”.
The root of cognitive errors is actually that they cannot believe and still look forward to it. Therefore, when a third party appears, most women will use crying and making a fuss to find traces of their existence, and try to use this method to gain the other party's intentions. But in real life, men will not feel sorry for you like this or reflect on their own mistakes. They will only be more grateful that their departure is correct.
Want to salvage yourself from the abyss of betrayal, crying and making trouble are never useful. We only have one way to go, that is, accept, face and change. Don’t rely on the other party, and don’t expect the other party to change. Whoever is in pain will make changes.
Smart women understand this principle, so they only allow themselves to be depressed and frustrated for a while, and then use time and energy to change, rather than entangled with emotions and waiting for the other party to reconcile with themselves.
There are too many facts that women can do, such as eating, drinking, having fun, dressing up, and having rich experience. However, in real life, most women are clamoring for the preciousness of youth, while trapping themselves in the middle of food, rice, oil and salt, love and being loved, internal friction and trapping.
Please be sure to be clear that our time is precious. We should focus all our energy on ourselves, rather than wandering in small places, tangling in trivial and uselessness, calm down when encountering things, clearing the way through mountains, building bridges across water, and killing women from all directions will always be smoother and more attractive than women who only know how to cry.
END
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