In the past, I was very concerned about other people's perception of me. For example, when I dressed in clothes today, I changed into a different style from the past, and I couldn't help but think about whether I was a bit independent, gave people a bad impression, etc. (Maybe the bottom is my usual inferiority complex). Or maybe I did something and found that it was very different from others' understanding. At this time, I always thought about explaining and letting everyone reach a consensus.
Misunderstanding, verb. Incorrect understanding; not in line with the original intention.
Misunderstanding usually occurs when everyone has their own opinions and explanations for everything, and everyone thinks that they are the right party. From this perspective, misunderstanding is someone else's business and has nothing to do with yourself. But for others, the views of others are correct rather than misunderstandings. In the end, we still want to reach an agreement with the other party, that is, I strongly hope that others can understand according to my way of thinking.
What is the main reason for the misunderstanding? Individual subjective will and tendencies. We are the product of the environment, and different experiences and past will affect our views on things. We are subject to our own cognition and the situation we are in at that time. To be objective and accurate is to confront our instincts, which is very, very anti-human. Moreover, every misunderstanding has a reason, and it is not realistic to take all ideas and opinions into consideration one by one.
What do we want to do?
1. If you have misunderstandings about yourself, don’t rush to defend yourself. It depends on our original intention of doing things. For example, for the same thing, especially the partners, I will assume that the other party is thinking about us and listen to the other party’s advice to a certain extent, rather than first doubting the other party’s responsibility like another colleague, because our ultimate goal is to solve the problem. In this case, I will tell my thinking logic to my colleagues, then your attitude towards partners and your interpretation of me are not the issues I need to consider.
2. For others, we must make conclusions a little later, especially not make value judgments. Because what I know is limited and what I see is not complete, I understand this from the perspective of my growth. Don’t know that others are suffering, don’t advise others to be good.
I face this world with the greatest kindness, of course it is not foolish and kindness. It is acceptable to suffer losses once or twice. By the third time, I was already away from malice, which is why I am surrounded by good people. I really feel that there are many good people in the world, and treat them with kindness and reward them with kindness. From this point of view, we don’t have to care about other people’s misunderstandings about us. We also try not to do things that others misunderstand. We always reflect on ourselves. Is there someone suffering from the same misunderstanding because of me?
Some people are open-minded and regard misunderstandings and grievances as a kind of training and laugh it off; even more powerfully, they are the people who never care about them. They have firm goals and only things in their eyes. They don’t even have a misunderstanding. This state cannot be achieved by ordinary people. But we can at least not let misunderstandings affect our emotions and worry about it.
Those who know me say I am worried, and those who don’t know me say I am worried. Don’t worry too much about the outside world’s vision, do more practical things, this is my requirement for myself.
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