Interesting Notes (1) Text/Xu Sutian [Motto: A thousand golds can’t buy a smile; humor is the advanced lubricant of life] [1] Super harmonious I have an acquaintance named Bai Yishun, who is the same age as me and is a little younger than me. After a few years of getting to know

Interesting Notes (1)

Text/Xu Sutian

[Motto: A thousand gold can’t buy a smile; humor is the advanced lubricant of life]

[1] Super Harmonious

I have an acquaintance named Bai Yishun, who is the same age as me, and his birth month is a little younger than me. After a few years of getting to know each other, I found that he rarely spoke, and never raised his mouth with anyone, and had a pleasant smile on his face all day long. Later I heard everyone say that this is Bai Yishun's characteristic, and this person will not have any disputes with others even if he is beaten to death. I couldn't help but secretly amaze and decided to challenge his "super harmonious posture" to see how he reacted and to personally verify whether his special nature is true or false.

We met unexpectedly yesterday. He first asked me: How are your health recently? I said the situation was not very good, and he asked what was wrong. I said, "I was not resting normally, I was sleeping too much, I couldn't feel it after 10 seconds. I couldn't open my eyes at 7 o'clock in the morning, so I shouted a few times before I woke up. I couldn't have my appetite. Every meal, I ate more than two steamed buns as big as cats. Once I went to the toilet or the garbage dump, I always felt that there was no delicious food at all. What's wrong with me? This is!" He listened very seriously, thought for a while, and said to me with great concern: "Don't feel too stressed. I think you are in menopause? Since you come, don't be anxious, it's better." Hearing his answer, my god, I was so moved, I was a little dizzy!

He asked me again, if nothing else was wrong, I said nothing big, I would talk to you about some small things, and he said it would be fine, so I would continue to talk about it.

I said, "Because of my discomfort, I went to buy a casserole for making medicine. It was smooth and thick, so I must be hard. I lacked garlic mortar at home. You might as well use it to pound garlic. But it was easy to use it, but it was easy to use. I pounded a handful of garlic cloves so hard that it was not damaged at all. One pot and two use, you said it was wonderful and not good!" As I said, observing the expression on Bai Yishun's face, he was a little surprised in peace, and then calmed down quickly and said slowly, "Oh, it's good, why is the quality so good! Where did you buy it? I will buy one for a few days." My dear mother, I was dizzy again! I hurriedly said, "Sky Supermarket, I bought it in Sky Supermarket, I heard it is out of stock."

I continued, "Brother, go to my house to play. Do you know, my house has recently built a house, which I designed by myself, and there are no doors and windows on it, and there are no skylights on it." Bai Yishun smiled faintly and said, "You guy is really creative. This house is better designed, it is as tight as it is, warm as it is. Although it is a little inconvenient to enter and exit, it is not a big problem. With your great wisdom, I think there is a way out." I turned my back and said quietly, "Oh, oh, there is an authenticity." He nodded in applause. I'm dizzy, I'm so dizzy!

I was still unwilling to give up and continued, "I went to the market yesterday and encountered a strange thing. I went to a cold storage and bought a few kilograms of frozen hairtail fish. When I came back, I walked to the river and wanted to wash the hairtail fish. Who knew that as soon as I put it in the water, I swam away a few of them." This time, I thought there was nothing I could do. Bai Yishun would not refuse, so he waited for him to answer, but he calmly said, "Oh, these fish can really toss. There are so strange things in the world. There are all kinds of good things, so amazing!" After hearing this, I was dizzy! Is

really not able to provoke the challenge? I'm going to make a final attempt. I said mysteriously, "Have you heard that something strange happened in Tianhai City a while ago. The people said that they saw the sun coming out from the west in the morning. Tianhai TV station also reported it specifically." He frowned, thought for a while, and then said thoughtfully: "It is very likely.Now that science is so advanced, nothing can happen! The moon has already climbed up, and it is not a very simple thing for scientists to ask the earth to turn backwards! "I was stunned when I heard what he said was reasonable and confident, and even said, "That's right, that's right. "

I'm convinced... I thought to myself: "If this person was the leader of the United States or Japan, there wouldn't be so many troubles in this world. How great would it be! "

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[2] Principal Che divorced

This is a true story seventy years ago.

Principal Che is called He Shan, who served as the principal of a rural primary school at the beginning of Jiefang.

Place Everyone calls him Principal Che, which is due to his comedy experience.

Heshan was a relatively rare cultural person back then. He was born in 1931 and studied in a private school for a few years. He understood some Four Books and Five Classics , so he entered the school to teach at the age of seventeen or eighteen, and got into the position of primary school principal at the age of twenty.

He had a wife Wang, two years older than him, who was ordered by his parents when he was 17 years old. , the matchmaker married an ordinary rural girl with a dignified and elegant face and good at doing internal and external tasks, but she was not educated. She had little feet, a big bun covered with a net behind her head, and was wearing clothes embroidered with colorful lace. She was a typical old-style woman.

When the marriage started, the couple was loving and beautiful. When Teacher Xiao He was promoted to principal, his status changed, his vision became higher, and he frequently saw many cadres and literati who changed their love. He became more and more dissatisfied with his wife. , gradually felt like he was chaff, so he wanted to leave the court and change his meal. Finally, one night, Principal Heshan showed up to divorce with his wife, for only one reason, not another, because he had been sleeping in the same room for three years, and he had been infertile for a long time. He had been unfilial to the point of "no descendant is the greatest". This must be a disagreement and must break up. Wang knew that his original intention had changed and he had another whim, but he could not resist him. In desperation, he had to promise him to go to the township government to get a divorce together tomorrow.

After breakfast the next day, the two set out to the village. Wang's little feet of 3-inch golden lotus , which was difficult to travel far, so he had to take a car when he went out. There was no bicycle at that time, so Principal Xiao He found a trolley. The car only had a wooden wheel, and the wheel was a wooden frame for people to sit on. The rear end of the frame was accompanied by two wooden handlebars. The back end of the handlebar was tied with a canvas climbing belt. The person who pushed the cart could put it on his shoulder and neck, so he could help when he was moving.

He Shan added some cotton oil to the bearings of the car, put cotton mattress on the frame, and let his wife Wang get on the car. He pushed his arms and legs, creaking and pushing hard. The village was ten miles away from the village, full of bumpy dirt roads. Xiao He was a white-faced scholar. He had never used such strength and did not know how to keep the wheeled wooden car balance. It was hot summer at that time, so he couldn't walk for four or five miles, and he was already sweating, panting, and overdrawn. The woman happened to go to Xiao Jie, so she stopped to rest. The woman smiled sweetly and said, "It's so heartbreaking to be tired. Please rest for a while. Don't worry, I'll go." After that, she went straight to the depths of the sorghum.

Principal Xiao He took a long rest, but the woman did not come back for a long time, and there was no movement. He shouted a few times, but there was no reply. Xiao He felt something was strange, so he went to search for it in the sorghum field, finding a large piece of green gauze tent, his voice was almost hoarse, and there was no woman at all. Xiao He didn't know what happened, and waited for a long time in dismay, but there was no result. He had to push the empty car dejectedly and return to the village weakly, wanting to invite the villagers to find someone again. The marriage was not completed, and he ended up being hot, tired, thirsty and hungry, and even lost his wife, and he was in a very embarrassing sight.

When I returned home, I saw that the door was closed and I was not locked. I couldn't help but be secretly surprised. I opened the main entrance of the hall and saw it, ah! I saw Wang sitting at the door, threading a needle and doing a job.With eyes facing each other, both of them looked half crying and half laughing. The woman stretched out her tongue and the man glared. After a moment of stunnedness, Principal Xiao He yelled angrily: "What's going on, you!" The woman said calmly: "It's hard to say. Seeing that you are so tired and so hungry, let's have a meal first. I'll tell you slowly after dinner."

The woman of Wang stood up and ran to the room. She quickly brought a few hot and fragrant big white steamed buns, and then brought a few hot dishes, cold drinks and hot soup. The dining table was filled. The chicken, fish, meat and eggs were full of fragrance, and the hungry Principal He completely disappeared. Looking at the cute husband who was eating voraciously, Woman Wang covered her face and giggled.

After drinking and eating, a basin of neither hot nor cold foot washing water was brought over again. The woman pressed her husband's dirty feet into the water and gently rubbed and rubbed... Principal He enjoyed the caress of warm water and slender hands. It was so comfortable and comfortable, and his heart was gradually getting drunk. The woman raised her head and asked gently: "How is it? Do you want to hear what's going on?" Xiao He nodded, and the woman smiled again and started talking.

"It's also a bad thing, so we won't do things smoothly. By the way, I went to Xiaojie. Aunt suddenly came. In awkward situation, I think today is unlucky. In addition, you are too tired. I think today's work cannot be done well. I'd better change the day. If you don't want to be tired again, you will push it back, so I took the small path back by myself. I didn't discuss it for you, so I'll be anxious if you are anxious."

The principal He listened and thought carefully. He had already deeply realized: this illiterate little woman is definitely not a fool or a slut, she is really a little scheming and has some tricks, and she can't bear to see it! Xiao He clearly knew that her aunt's saying was a virtual word, but she was really smart and calculating. She also had a table of delicious food and a bowl of clean and warm foot washing water. Her virtuous heart can be seen, which was really touching. Just pretend to be confused and say nothing. Thinking of this, Xiao He said with the flow: "Don't be angry, don't be angry. I'm just afraid that you will get lost. I'm so anxious. It's fine, it's fine."

Mrs. Wang's face gave a naughty smile, and then asked softly: "When will you go to the village again?"

A very complicated expression appeared on Principal He's face, and he replied: "I won't go, I'll make you so troubled. If you want to go, then you can push me tomorrow." The woman gently hit him, pinched him again, and smiled happily.

For many years, the two of them have never been to the village together. Later they gave birth to two men and one woman, and the man taught the woman to help them live a beautiful life. Principal Che's car has been upgrading, from wooden wheels to bicycles, to electric cars, and finally to ride in a car, but his wife has never changed. People often see them driving around in unison. However, the story of "Principal He's divorce by pushing a cart" was spread at that time. Everyone did not think it was ugly, but instead became a good story. Later, when everyone saw He Shan, they all called him "Principal Che", and many young people even didn't know that his surname was He. Principal Che also acknowledged this title and always gave him a laugh, perhaps taking that divorce trip as a beautiful memory.

Author profile: Xu Sutian, born in 1945, from Heze, Shandong Province, was admitted to the Department of Mathematics of Shandong University in 1962, graduated from the Cultural Revolution in 1968, and was assigned to teach at Jiangtuan High School in Laiyang, Shandong Province. He was later transferred back to Dingtao No. 1 Middle School as deputy director of the Academic Affairs Office and also served as senior high school mathematics. In 1988, he was named one of the first batch of senior mathematics teachers in Shandong Province and retired in 1999. The author has loved reading since childhood, loves literature, likes writing, and has published works from time to time.